Domestic Violence Signs Ė The Visible
and Invisible Signs of Domestic Abuse
by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
Domestic abuse is both visible and invisible. And when you live the insidious enigma, you know the invisible signs of an abusive relationship to be as disturbing as the visible signs of domestic abuse.
Visible Domestic Abuse
The visible signs of domestic violence are the blatant abusive acts that bombard you throughout the day. It can be the name-calling, emotional manipulation, property destruction, physical restraining...bodily injury.
Its physical manifestation is the use of battering to establish and maintain an unequal distribution of power within the relationship. These domestic abuse signs are visible with your naked eye and usually apparent for outsiders to see.
You may not always know where the blows come from but when they show up in your face, they are undeniable...as they occur. Itís only after the fact that you may discount their existence.The Invisible Domestic Abuse
The invisible signs of domestic abuse are more tricky. They perplex and puzzle you in their vague, yet palpable, presentation. In the moment that you experience them, you feel yourself as less than...deficient in...convincingly lacking.
Itís not so much how your abusive partner treats and sees you; rather, itís how you experience yourself in his presence. Itís the compromised gestalt that overcomes you from the inside out.
I say these signs are invisible because you canít readily point to a particular action identifying and defining them. So from the outside looking in, they may go un-noticed. But in your shoes, itís as clear as the day is long. And you hate it. You despise the way your feel when overcome by its crippling, gripping nature.
Lessons from the Signs of Domestic Abuse
If you encounter either the visible or the invisible signs of domestic violence, take a hard and honest look at your relationship. Resist the tendency to sweep this big elephant under the carpet, because one day when least expected you will trip. And the fall you take may destroy you. You are the only one who can see both the invisible and the visible signs of domestic violence. Therefore, it is up to you to yield accordingly.
For information on the signs of domestic violence , visit www.preventabusiverelationships.com/identify_domestic_abuse.php and claim your Free Instant Access to Survivor Success eInsights. Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps couples nationwide recognize, end and heal from domestic abuse. Copyright 2010 Jeanne King, Ph.D. - Domestic Violence Prevention and InterventionThis series of eInsights is presented to you by Partners in Prevention, a nonprofit organization. If you find this eInsight article useful, we invite you to contribute to the maintenance and growth of the Survivor Success Tips & eInsights. To make a tax-deductible donation, please visit www.EndDomesticAbuse.org
Dr. Jeanne King is a licensed psychologist and domestic abuse consultant. Feel free to contact us if you need help with physical and/or emotional pain, stress-related illnesses, or relationship abuse issues at home or in court. Contact Us to reach Dr. King.