Abuse and Divorce
Money and Mental Illness as the Weapon
in Domestic Violence Divorce
by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
Many people believe that battered women can just pick up and go. And this will end their battering and abuse. Not so…when abuse is in divorce.
Far too often what happens in cases of domestic abuse is that leaving simply opens the door to another level of domestic violence. Now this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t go; rather when you exit, do so mindfully and with all your ducks in a row.
Why Does It Get Worse When You Leave?
As we know, abuse is about control. Violence is the manifestation of domestic abuse, however domestic abuse is truly about control. When the batterer believes he/she is losing their domination, the violations will escalate so as to regain control over the victimized partner.
This is why the abused are at a greater risk for injury upon their departure. While internally, they feel more empowered, they are subject to acts of violence to reinstate the control of partner abuse.
The Money Factor and Spousal Abuse
Now when the couple is married and have a marital estate to divide (which could include children), it can get very messy. Here’s why...
Legal soldiers are paid to become an extension of the economically empowered spouse’s campaign, which may very well involve silencing the victim’s plight. Once in divorce proceedings, the abuse strategy shifts toward discrediting the abused and saving face for the abuser. It’s human nature to seek to cover up the dirty abusive laundry from the marital home.
A popular way in which this is done is to discredit the victim by attempting to establish that she/he is “crazy” (mentally ill), or with some other social defect to deem her/him not believable in the eyes of the divorce court. The abused children are silenced with allegations of behavioral disturbance or mere accusations of being pathological liars.
What victims fight against or run from once this campaign is underway is the perpetrators use of the legal-health care system to re-victimize them. The extent of this chase is essentially determined by the money factor. The more the money, the longer and more complicated the chase.
Choices for Victims Being Re-Victimized
Victims subjected to efforts in silencing the victimization can hang in there or let go. These are the two options available when it comes to re-victimization through legal domestic abuse.
If you are in this situation, you will want to arm yourself with all you can learn about the legal psychiatric ploys of domestic violence divorce. You will want to learn how to protect your mental health status and that of your children before it spirals out of your control.
For more information about abuse and divorce, visit http://www.enddomesticabuse.org/crazy_making.php and claim your Free Instant Access to Survivor Success eInsights. Psychologist Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps individuals nationwide end and heal from domestic abuse at home and in court. © Jeanne King, Ph.D. — Domestic Violence Prevention and Intervention
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Dr. Jeanne King is a licensed psychologist and domestic abuse consultant. Feel free to contact us if you need help with physical and/or emotional pain, stress-related illnesses, or relationship abuse issues at home or in court. Contact Us to reach Dr. King.