Domestic Abuse
The Dangers of Laymen Psychiatric Labeling
in Abusive Relationships

 

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Are you a psychologist? That’s the question I want to ask people when they tell me that their spouse is a sociopath or has a borderline personality disorder.

While these terms are used in everyday language, that doesn’t mean they are laymen concepts. And nor should they be flung around without the license and expertise to fully grasp their meaning.

Amateur Psychiatrics and Psychological Conclusions

I often hear people tell me about a book that they read describing a specific mental/behavioral disorder pulled out of the DSM IV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). They tell me that the vignettes described in the book are exactly like their spouse.

And, of course, this then means that he/she is likely to have the same condition. Then, the more they read and the more vignettes they come across all pointing to the same descriptions solidifies their hunch…which then becomes their “knowing.” From here they may go around telling people that their spouse has such and such condition, and this is the root cause of their relationship troubles.

The problem with this thinking is that it creates presumptions about the relationship based on information that is not factual. It draws conclusions about one’s partner that may not be true…and it limits the possibilities about one’s life in the relationship.

Enlightened Amateur

Now this doesn’t mean that I object to people writing about psychological matters to the general population. If you know my writing you know I do the same. I write about psychological concepts to a nonprofessional audience, specially people in abusive relationships.

My voice is from the laymen’s perspective infusing psychological insights specific to my training and professional experience. As a psychologist and person who once lived in an abusive relationship, I urge you to research your hunches before drawing psychological conclusions.

You can take the vignettes and the examples that you have pertaining to your spouse to a licensed professional psychologist and use that information to springboard into inquiry and discovery.

It will surprise you to learn the many paths available to further your understanding of the abuse dynamics in your relationship. It may also create an opening for your partner’s engagement in the growth process or his/her deepening their involvement to better your relationship.

Keep reading, keep researching and keep your eyes and ears open. If you truly believe that there are some serious psychological issues and conditions in his/her personality, seek to find a professional knowledgeable in both psychopathology and domestic violence dynamics.

For more information about controlling abusive relationships, visit http://www.preventabusiverelationships.com/controlling_relationship.php and claim Free Instant Access the 7 Realities of Verbal Abuse. Our programs help men (as well as women) in abusive relationships. Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps people nationwide recognize, end and heal from domestic abuse.

© Jeanne King, Ph.D. — Domestic Violence Prevention and Intervention