Receive Survivor Success Tips  & Insights and get FREE life-saving, life-enhancing support by email.
First Name:
Last Name: (optional)
Zip Code: (optional)

We respect your privacy.
We do not sell or share
email addresses.

Privacy Policy

Intimate Partner Abuse Screen




After the Abusive Relationship - 7 Clues for Knowing You're Doing What Is Right for You

domestic violence consulting expert


By Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.


Domestic violence survivors often wonder what next? Now, that I’m no longer defined by my role in my “other life,” then what next... Who is this person? What is this person? What ought this person be doing with her life?

In some respects this pondering is typical of battered women. However, it’s also true that women at large have similar thoughts when what was once their assumed identity no longer exists.


So what’s next?” they ask.


When there is something in your life that “the more you have it, the more it has you,” that’s what you need to be doing. That’s what is next! Now some things that carry on in this fashion are good for you and the universe; and others are not. How do you know the difference?


Here are 7 clues that you’re on track with what’s right for you:


1) When you do this activity, you lose yourself.


2) When you do this activity, time stops.


3) When you do this activity, you are at one with it.


4) When you’re done doing this activity, you long to do more of it.


5) Anywhere from immediately after to 20 minutes after finishing this activity, you feel good, elevated, enhanced, ...outright content!


6) This activity is not fattening, illegal, unethical or immoral.


7) Lastly, the world is a better place by virtue of your doing this activity.


If you take a moment or several moments daily to be still within yourself, this that you are to be doing will emerge and sing to you louder than any sound imaginable. You will be drawn to do that which sings in this fashion. And doing so will be the shortest road to your inner well-being and long-term peace.

For more information about abusive relationships, survivor success secrets and healing insights, visit and claim you free, Survivor Success Tips & eInsights. Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., psychologist, author and speaker, helps individuals identify and end domestic abuse, and heal from abusive relationships.

If you want personal help with your particular circumstances, you can contact us to set up an individual consultation.

This series of eInsights is presented to you by Partners in Prevention, a nonprofit organization. If you find this eInsight article useful, we invite you to contribute to the maintenance and growth of the Survivor Success Tips & eInsights. To make a tax-deductible donation, please visit


©Copyright 2008 Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Dr. Jeanne King is a licensed psychologist and domestic abuse consultant. Feel free to contact us if you need help with physical and/or emotional pain, stress-related illnesses, or relationship abuse issues at home or in court. Contact Us to reach Dr. King.