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By Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
Often times the emotion domestic abuse victims/survivors feel is so intense, it seems like it could consume you. I think this is partly due to the isolation that characterizes the syndrome.
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There aren’t a lot of people to talk to about what’s going on and many times there is no one at all. The emotion builds internally until it feels as though it may implode onto itself.
Don’t let that happen. Here’s what you can do.
Experiential Focusing for Healing Emotions
It’s a little procedure that is an excellent way of moving psychological, emotional and mental distress forward. It’s called “experiential focusing,” originally introduced by Dr. Eugene Gendlin in the 60’s.
Here’s how it goes. In the moment you feel the distress, close your eyes and let your attention fall inward...first notice your breath as it moves in and out of your body.
Then as your feel some inward settling and orientation from within, pay attention to the part of the body where you normally feel things.
Possibly this is in your gut, your chest, your shoulders, your neck...wherever you typically feel bodily sensation when you are upset or disturbed in any way.
Now stay with this.... You will notice that as you pay attention to the part of the body where you normally feel things, a distinct "bodily felt sense" will emerge... And in staying with that, what will happen is words will bubble up...bringing meaning to what’s felt.
With some back and forth inner inquiry...those words can move/transform the emotional distress—sometimes subtly and sometimes dramatically.
Ultimately one discovers, in doing this, a shift. An experiential shift that actually leaves you different with respect to what previously troubled you.
Now I know it’s hard to follow something like this from the written word as it is happening. Read this to yourself over and over and enact these little instructions next time you are having some emotional, psychological, mental distress.
You will be moved to notice how you can actually move the emotion…how you can discover what’s under the emotion...how you can create your own emotional healing.
If you want some audio guidance on this procedure as it relates to domestic abuse, see the Intimate Partner Abuse Screen. These instructions introduce the online domestic abuse diagnostic test.
If you want more information on healing for emotional abuse, I invite you to check out Psychological Healing for Domestic Abuse. Dr Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps people recognize, end and heal from domestic abuse.
©Copyright 2008 Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. www.PreventAbusiveRelationships.com
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